The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

21:43 Sep 27 2009
Times Read: 642

I am going to change my yahoo i.d. again.

I hate the name I have. It's retarded. It sounds emo and it makes me wanna cut.



I need something not so retarded when I have to give the email to certain places. And they are like 'wtf is wrong with this bish'.



There are some people on it that I want to go away and this will be the easiest to make that happen.



Maybe then I'll actually sign on again.

19:25 Sep 21 2009
Times Read: 652

AH HA!



I finally figure out how to do the graphics path thingie.



-shifty eyes-



Yes, I'm blonde. Lemmelone.

02:09 Sep 18 2009
Times Read: 676

Yesterday was that thing I dreaded doing. But I sucked it up and went into it with an open mind.



I do feel a little better today. A smidgen.

About |--| that much. I have a feeling this is going to be a long road. I need it though.

I realized that yesterday.



I had planned on just going to get through the upcoming event, but I've decided that muh biddy and muh Punkie were right.



I do need it and I just might be worth it. :)

02:40 Sep 14 2009
Times Read: 698

I think this is going to have to be one of those entries I make every month. I'll make it an FAQ section. heh.



1. Will you add me to your friends list?



Me: No, probably not. If you are a person I enjoy speaking with or enjoy in general than I more than likely will. However, if I've never spoken to you, then no.

But.. But I added you!



Still No. I didn't ask you to add me. I thank you for adding me. Whether you talk to me is your choice.



2. Will you rate me?



Me: Yes, I will rate someone when I get a chance. But do not think that just because I go to rate you it's an automatic 10 from me. I don't play that game. I do not rate what I get, nor do I revenge rate, or anything of that kind of thing.



But I rated you a 10!



Thank you, that was nice of you.



3. "You have been rated by So an So. Please return the favor".



Me: Maybe, Maybe not. I do not see rating as a 'favor'. It is something to do to gain status and move up levels. I also do not see rating everyone a 10 as a favor.



4. Will you add me to your favorite journals list?



Me: Egh. Every great once in a while I'll read a journal. You've got a better chance of me adding someone to this than putting someone on my friends list. At least on my favorite journals list I can ignore it. heh.



5. Will you stalk me?



Me: No. I don't even stalk myself, why would I want to stalk someone else?



I've been here for like 5 years. Within that time I don't think my friends list has went over 20 people. I am sure it's been less. Now, I have 30. Holy Crap it's a record for me.

04:54 Sep 10 2009
Times Read: 723

I am having a hard time being 'social'. I just really.. have no desire to be. Like I would rather stare out the window and look at the clouds than sit here and just babble about nothing.



I'm not mad at anyone, sad about anything or anything crazy. Maybe it's just being overwhelmed and I am not sure what to do with it so I just work it out in quiet.



Then again maybe I am crazy and they will give me some kick ass drugs, a rawkin' straight jacket and let me color all the time.



That'd be sweet.

02:59 Sep 04 2009
Times Read: 736

I finished reading Harry Potter again. For like the billionth time. And every damn time I get to the last book I cry. Jeebus.



Most people cry when Bambi's mom got killed. Oh, no not me. I only cry when Harry puts the snitch up to his mouth and says "I am going to die", Holy Goodness.



Gah. I'm a smuck. -shifty eyes-

04:08 Sep 01 2009
Times Read: 660

Ugh. No More.



No More. No More. No More.



When it's not one thing it's another. Or when it is one thing, suddenly other stuff just seems to decide to happen at the same time.



After avoiding it for months and months, I now have to go see one of them . I do not want to. I will not handle it well. I do not want to talk about it. I just want it to be over. It will not make me better. It will probably just make me even more angry.



Then I have to prepare to go to a hearing. Why? Because I am not a fifth generation government-screw-er-over, I've managed to not have kids, to not have some sort of crack addiction that puts me on the street, I've never been to jail, and oh let's not forget, I actually have someone that gives a damn about me and won't push me onto the streets so I won't die in a ditch some place because of my issues.



I really question the ideas of things.



Official " Oh, I see you've not had any children, you don't smoke crack on a regular basis, you're not prostituting, you've never been to jail, and you've never really been any kind of a problem within society. Well, I'm sorry I am going to have to decline you for any kind of help because you're just not fucked up enough to earn it.



Oh but, now you, YOU on the other hand with 20 kids by 20 different people, smoke crack and do heroin, you've been arrested for making a meth lab in your bathtub, and you would rather turn tricks than actually doing something that requires your brain and not your back. Now YOU are the prime candidate for help! here take it all! USE it ALL! It's okay, you are just fucked up enough to receive help! We are so glad we have you!"



It's so friggin stupid.